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Mia Garlock

Filling Another’s Cup & Powering Down

Yesterday ended up being a little bit crazy. I woke up late, rushed through getting my husband to work, and then my Son woke up and wouldn’t go back to bed without snuggles- so being nap trapped as I was, I ended up falling asleep while I snuggled him and then didn’t get up until nearly 9am.

Thursdays are grocery days, and also Bestie days, when we hang out and run our errands and spend the day being goofy goblins in public places and mortifying the elderly in every location. But we had a little different plans yesterday than the usual.

One of our friends recently had a baby, about three weeks ago. At the same time, her entire family world got turned upside down and so instead of the blissful and supported babymoon she should be having… it’s been hard. Really hard. Bestie and I had a hunch she was going to need some love poured into her cup, so we armed ourselves with lunch for all the kids and the moms, desserts because duh, and then we armed ourselves with cleaning equipment and got to work on a few rooms that really needed it.

Post Partum Mother’s don’t need people to come over and hold the baby while they clean or chase after the other kids. They need someone to do the dishes while they nurse the baby for the umpteenth time that morning. For someone to bring them food that was made with love and real ingredients, not the packaged convenient crap in pretty colors. When Mom brings home a new baby, she needs someone to clean the bathroom for them real quick because gods only know when the last time they could reach those corners to get it done. And they need someone to clean out that smelly cat box. So that’s exactly what we did.

Keep Reaching Out Your Hand. A Court of Silver Flames by Sarah J Maas

We scrubbed her kitchen and the floors. We cleaned the cat boxes and wiped down the bathrooms. We fed everyone and kept them busy so she could take a break, and cleaned our mess up afterwards. And then we helped feed her sheep and took some notes of a few other things she could use a hand with, and made promises to return soon.

I was exhausted by the end of the day, but felt really good about helping my friend. It reminded me of Valkyrie Squad so much, that community of people all supporting each other and loving each other and cheering each other on in the low hard spots of life when it’s tough or heartbreaking. I realized a long time ago how badly I needed that in my life, and I’m seeing it all around me in my friend circles- the supportive messages are wonderful and lovely and some days I go back to them over and over again to remind myself of that support.

But we need action. Words are wonderful, they can inspire, change the world, lift someone up, motivate, and do so many beautiful things. Sometimes though it’s not enough, and we need to step up and get our hands dirty. I spent the day supporting my friend, listening to her vent her anger and heartache, helping out with the cluster of children in the halls and the yard, and tidying up the most usable spaces so that when everyone got to bed, she could sit down and not think about the dishes or the floors or the litter boxes. I used my muscles to scrub mirrors and countertops and carry children instead of lifting weights or counting reps. It was a great use of my energy, and one I plan on revisiting soon.

Today, I’m 100% in the throes of PMS. I’m exhausted as hell, my cramps are harsh and I’m bloated. And I found a zit on my chin this morning. Great. I really just want to go back to bed and stay there for about 10 hours and eat some cheesy snacks. I don’t know what it is about the cheese this month, but I cannot eat enough of it.

I’ve got some tasty recipes to churn out real quick with some editing and then I’ll be back in my blanket burrito living my best cheesy life.

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